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░ ██ ██ Artist: Black Tears ██ ██
▓ █░░ ■█ Album: Child of the Storm █■ ░░█
■ █▓▀ █ Year: 1988 █ ▀▓█ ░
█ ▓ Rel. Date: 2018-02-26 ▓ █
▒ ▒ Genre: Heavy Metal ▒ ▒
█▄ ░ Label: Steamhammer ░ ▄█
░ █▄ ░ Source: CD ░ ▄█
░ █▓ Type: Bootleg Reissue ▓█ ░
▓ █ Quality: VBR, 44.1kHz, Joint Stereo █ ░ ▓
▓ █ █ ░ ▓
▄ ■ ■ ▓ ■
░█ █░ ▀
█ It would be reasonable to assume Black Tears' █
█ debut album Child of the Storm is unburdened by █
█ sophistication and societal norms. It looks like █
█ the type of album that says "I don't care what you █
█ think: we're going to play metal however we like." █
█ And you'd be right. They like to play metal slowly █
█ and lifelessly, without caring what anyone thinks. █
█ While this may seem to contradict what I just █
█ said, Black Tears' primary inspiration seems to be █
█ Motorhead. But please note: Black Tears is, at █
█ best, an ill-advised mimicry of On Parole. Even █
█ impersonating Motorhead's tamest album requires a █
█ lot more passion and effort than what was put into █
█ this anemic drudgery. The surly, working-man's █
█ vocals supplied by Mathias Staub are a good start, █
█ but this gruffness clashes hideously with an █
█ insistence to keep everything at such a safe, █
█ deliberate tempo. I've heard faster sounds come █
█ from continental drift. █
█ Bjorn Greinert is the primary culprit for such █
█ tedium, as his efforts behind the kit were █
█ outmatched by the impatient drumming of my █
█ fingers. Breakdowns - or should I say the █
█ breakdown - is a rare occurrence, as cymbal █
█ splashes are usually deemed sufficient. The first █
█ four tracks feature some extremely similar variant █
█ on a "Boo Bah, Boo-boo bah" beat, which may have a █
█ more dignified name, but I refuse to look it up █
█ and therefore go to more effort than Greinert. █
█ Therefore, besides 'Crown of the Damned' sounding █
█ a bit like Brocas Helm on a bad day, anything even █
█ somewhat noteworthy is located on Side B. Here, █
█ bassist and acoustic guitarist Uwe Kohler is given █
█ some time to shine with energetic, galloping riffs █
█ akin to Blaze Bayley-era Iron Maiden in 'Only █
█ Memories'. This is actually a compliment, since █
█ we're grading on a curve here. More enjoyable █
█ still is 'Dialog Between the Evil and the Good' █
█ breaking into double-time with shredding guitar █
█ solos at the helm. Riffs by Peter Kohler were █
█ engaging and finally made perfect sense alongside █
█ Staub's gravelly, unreserved style. █
█ But alas, a couple of decent tracks cannot save an █
█ album. There really is nothing worse than █
█ time-wasting blandness that doesn't even have the █
█ common courtesy to be categorically bad. Child of █
█ the Storm is a cardboard box, as utilitarian as it █
█ is vapid, as difficult to criticize as it is █
█ difficult to compliment. And by 1985, there really █
█ was no excuse for such a mealy-mouthed metal album █
█ to unceremoniously sputter out of German borders. █
█ Alright, on second thought, it's pretty easy to █
█ criticize. █
█ █
█ Originally released on vinyl in 1984. █
█ This an unofficial CD reissue from 1988. █
▓ ▓
▒ ▒
░ 1. Black Tears 4:24 ░
░ 2. Crown of the Damned 5:04 ░
░ 3. Perfect Demon 3:43 ░
░ 4. Silver Woman 3:47 ░
░ 5. Child of the Storm 3:51 ░
░ 6. Rockin' to the Top 3:24 ░
░ 7. Dialog Between the Evil and the Good 3:14 ░
░ 8. Only Memories 5:39 ░
░ 33:06 ░
░ ▒ ▒
▓ █ ░ ▓ ░
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