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▄▄▄▓█▓▒▓▓▓▓▓███████▓▓▓▓▒▓█▓▄▄▄▒░ m0lo-
▄▄████████▓▓▓▓████████▀███▓▓██████▓▓▄▄ +CRO
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▐████▓▓▀ █ ▀▓█████▌
▐███▓▓▌ █ BETTER YOU TAKE THAT IS PROUD TO BRING YOU ▐▓████▌
▐████▓▓░ ▄ ▓█████▌
▐█████▓▓▄ MC Lars-Radio Pet Fencing ▄▓▓█▀███▌
▐██▀ ▀█▓▓▌ ▐▓▓██████▌
▐███▄██▓▓▓ ARTiST.... MC Lars ▓▓███████▌
▐█████▓▓▓▌ TiTLE..... Radio Pet Fencing ▐▓▓▓███▄█▌
▐███▓▓▀▀ LABEL..... Truck Records SOURCE... CDDA ▀▀▓▓▓██▌
▐█▓▀ GENRE..... Indie QUALiTY.. VBRkbps ▀▓█▌
▐█▌ ▄■ RiP.DATE.. Oct-24-2005 TRACKS... 12 ■▄ ▐▓▌
▐█░▄▄▓▌ STOREDATE. 000-00-2003 LENGTH... 48:13 min ▐▓▄▄ █▌
▐███▓▓ SUPPLiER. TEAM BUTT ▓▓███▌
▐██▓▓▌ ▐▓▓██▌
▐█▓▓▀ ▀▓▓▓▌
▐▓▌ NR. TRACKNAME TiME ▐█▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ 01 Hey That's Me 04:11 █▌
▐█ 02 Yes I Am An Alien 04:08 █▌
▐█ 03 Atom You're Awesome 02:55 █▌
▐█ 04 Certified 06:31 █▌
▐█ 05 Mr. Wormsly's Addiction 02:54 █▌
▐█ 06 The SΘance At Harpers Ferry 04:05 █▌
▐█ 07 My Rhymes Rhyme 04:05 █▌
▐█ 08 Rapbeth (Foul Is Fair) 04:09 █▌
▐█ 09 Make Way For Ducklings 04:26 █▌
▐█ 10 Humphrey The Whale 01:36 █▌
▐█ 11 Sarah 03:37 █▌
▐█ 12 Escape From Robot Island (Featuring MNP) 05:36 █▌
▐█ █▌▄
▐█ TOTAL TiME: 48:13 min █▌▄
▐█ TOTAL SiZE: 65,2 Mb ▄██
▐█ ▐█▀
▐█ █▌▄
▐█ <──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────> ▐█▀▓▀
▐█ █▌
▐█ RELEASE NOTES: ▐█▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ This CD is extremely rare and out of print..people have been █▌
▐█ looking for this for over a year: BUTT delivers! █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ MC Lars (real name: Andrew Nielsen) began making hip-hop-based █▌
▐█ tapes while still a kid, but was sidetracked from rap by such █▌
▐█ traditionally important issues to teenagers as playing guitar in █▌
▐█ a punk band and getting accepted to a college. Nielsen went to █▌
▐█ Stanford, and then did an exchange stint at Oxford, but all the █▌
▐█ while he was fiddling with desktop productions and developing █▌
▐█ his quirky, pop culture-savvy style. Boisterous live gigs and █▌
▐█ word of mouth built buzz for Lars' home studio raps (influences: █▌
▐█ everything from Atom & His Package and Weird Al Yankovic to █▌
▐█ KRS-One and the Beastie Boys). Then London imprint Truck Records █▌
▐█ issued a Lars full-length called Radio Pet Fencing in 2003, and █▌
▐█ the MC followed that with U.S. and U.K. tour dates. While the █▌
▐█ entirety of Fencing was recorded on his computer, the summer █▌
▐█ 2004 Side Cho EP Laptop -- while still charmingly simplistic -- █▌
▐█ was a comparatively grander production, with samples of notable █▌
▐█ rockers (Piebald, Brand New) and a stronger melodic sense. Cuts █▌
▐█ like "iGeneration" and "Signing Emo" were hits with downloaders █▌
▐█ and mtvU viewers, and MC Lars did live dates with groups like █▌
▐█ Gym Class Heroes and Bowling for Soup through spring 2005. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ The first album by MC Lars Horris (who later shortened his █▌
▐█ professional name to MC Lars) was recorded after the California █▌
▐█ native had moved to Oxford, England, to continue his studies. █▌
▐█ Something of a cross between the suburban-white-boy postures of █▌
▐█ MC Chris (the relentlessly sarcastic rapper/animator familiar to █▌
▐█ fans of Sealab 2021 and Aqua Teen Hunger Force) and the █▌
▐█ self-contained DIY electro-punk of Atom and His Package (who is █▌
▐█ justly saluted in this album's "Atom You're Awesome"), MC Lars █▌
▐█ Horris makes what he calls "post-punk laptop rap." The beats are █▌
▐█ unapologetically canned, with the backing tracks on most songs █▌
▐█ sounding like he came up with them after playing with Apple's █▌
▐█ Garageband software for 20 minutes or so, but no matter, since █▌
▐█ the focus is always on Horris' raps, whether hilariously, █▌
▐█ dorkily self-aggrandizing like "My Rhymes Rhyme," or covering █▌
▐█ offbeat real-world topics like a whale that became a local news █▌
▐█ celebrity in Northern California after it mistakenly swam up the █▌
▐█ Sacramento River. As is the case with Atom and His Package, the █▌
▐█ funny songs work as more than Weird Al Yankovic-style parody █▌
▐█ because of Horris' genuinely impressive way with words and █▌
▐█ appealingly regular-guy delivery. If this record was just a █▌
▐█ bunch of silly jokes, it would have no staying power, but it's █▌
▐█ -- at the very least -- a bunch of really clever and witty silly █▌
▐█ jokes. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Included are the lyrics: █▌
▐█ ------------------------ █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Hey That's Me █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ It's off the hook home slice, like a lucky fish. █▌
▐█ All I wish is that you taste this like a Swedish dish. █▌
▐█ It's the L-A-R-S, H-O double-R I-S... █▌
▐█ and I represent CV, and yes I must confess: █▌
▐█ IÆm back 2003 and the snare drum pumps. █▌
▐█ Back up, Kris Kross, itÆs my turn to jump. █▌
▐█ See IÆm a Libra and IÆm balanced, █▌
▐█ rocking it like Ritchie Valens, █▌
▐█ and IÆm up to this fresh session, █▌
▐█ yes IÆm up to this fresh challenge. █▌
▐█ And IÆm thinking, and IÆm writing, █▌
▐█ and IÆm rapping, and IÆll fighting █▌
▐█ all the layers of green apathy █▌
▐█ clogging up the zone. █▌
▐█ Because IÆll analyze your world, █▌
▐█ IÆll analyze your head. █▌
▐█ IÆll readjust your paradigm with this microphone. █▌
▐█ I was chilling in my Æ88 south on 101, █▌
▐█ with the woofer in the back bumping P.E. number one. █▌
▐█ Free-styling in a genre I didnÆt create, █▌
▐█ props to Melle Mel, Chuck D, and all eight █▌
▐█ hundred thousand MCÆs on whose shoulders I stand. █▌
▐█ IÆm just a white kid with a plastic jammie in his hand! █▌
▐█ See this MC here spends his life feeling fine, █▌
▐█ but doesnÆt often get off in a straight line. █▌
▐█ Fine, time will tell where heÆs headed. █▌
▐█ ItÆs up to chance, like GretelÆs path is breaded. █▌
▐█ Your criticism? IÆm above it! Your BS? LetÆs rubber glove it! █▌
▐█ Take your heroin and shove ità life youÆve got to love it. █▌
▐█ So get this, steal this, deal this, peel this away, █▌
▐█ I made this song out of my brain neurons and clay. █▌
▐█ It helped my brain chill for a week and a day, █▌
▐█ until one day it stopped working like the city of Pompeii. █▌
▐█ But itÆs okay, hey, because I roll it home. █▌
▐█ Knick knack paddy whack, my sonic range his grown. █▌
▐█ Profound like Antoine De Saint Exuperey, █▌
▐█ when I rock the chorus of this song I sayà █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ ôLars Horris,ö hey thatÆs me! █▌
▐█ Part Swedish, part Australian, full fun boy G. █▌
▐█ ôLars Horris,ö hey thatÆs me! █▌
▐█ I scored 1430 on my SATÆs. █▌
▐█ ôLars Horris,ö hey thatÆs me! █▌
▐█ IÆll rock the CoHo like 1-2-3. █▌
▐█ ôLars Horris,ö hey thatÆs me! █▌
▐█ I drop English and math and biology. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ I piss Catholics off with my comic in the Daily. ôWhyÆs it █▌
▐█ called æ27th StreetÆ?ö Man, donÆt front me. █▌
▐█ Jorge Cham might do ôPhD,ö but can he ever try to rock the mike █▌
▐█ like me? █▌
▐█ And IÆm weird like Al, donÆt attend Cal, D.J.Æs my buddy. WhoÆs █▌
▐█ Mike? █▌
▐█ Josh plays bass and I take wedding vows, █▌
▐█ to my hip-hop rhymes that IÆm busting now. █▌
▐█ And I satisfy women like GERÆs, █▌
▐█ I advocate the destruction of SUV cars. █▌
▐█ I think Israel and Palestine should get along. █▌
▐█ I sampled Nine Inch Nails for this song. █▌
▐█ And IÆm so post-modern, I donÆt even exist. █▌
▐█ Did you hear that P. Diddy? █▌
▐█ You just got dissed! █▌
▐█ ItÆs the twenty-first century, MCÆs please, █▌
▐█ youÆre killing hip-hop when you sample the Bee Gees! █▌
▐█ Most MCÆs today rap about five things: █▌
▐█ narcotics, cars, girls, clothes, and the bling bling. █▌
▐█ Delusions of grandeur in full swing, █▌
▐█ fascist self focus and diamond rings. █▌
▐█ But if Martin Luther King were alive today, █▌
▐█ how would he weigh the decay displayed? █▌
▐█ Homogenized identities, ourselves betrayed, █▌
▐█ thereÆs more to rap than just getting paid. █▌
▐█ And thereÆs more to life than MTV and Reeses Pieces, █▌
▐█ and when I sit in silence, my love for life increases. █▌
▐█ It feels great to pull the plug on the family TV, █▌
▐█ and make my own niche in society. █▌
▐█ And while I freak this beat, youÆre doing spoken word, █▌
▐█ trying to get your naked voice heard. █▌
▐█ If I didnÆt know ProTools, IÆd be like you █▌
▐█ and I could just do spoken word if I wanted to. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ ôLars Horris,ö hey thatÆs me! █▌
▐█ You might see me on the street bumping Run-DMC. █▌
▐█ ôLars Horris,ö hey thatÆs me! █▌
▐█ After my BA IÆll get my PhD. █▌
▐█ ôLars Horris,ö hey thatÆs me! █▌
▐█ Metaphysically fly like John DonneÆs ôThe Flea.ö █▌
▐█ ôLars Horris,ö hey thatÆs me! █▌
▐█ Rewriting Bronte like Wide Sargasso Sea. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Yes I Am an Alien █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Bam! IÆll explode, just like I were a bomb █▌
▐█ flying over Vietnam high with my Uncle Tom. █▌
▐█ Or sitting in a cabin having a sip of tea, █▌
▐█ while a parrot sings a song in the minor key of C, █▌
▐█ to inspire me, so we will see, █▌
▐█ this neurotic harmony that develops sonically. █▌
▐█ IÆll be writing my plan out with a needle, █▌
▐█ IÆll make you twist and shout and think I was Beatle. █▌
▐█ Like Lennon or Stalin in a car that wonÆt start, █▌
▐█ if your Volvo is stallinÆ then you need to learn the art █▌
▐█ of mechanics. DonÆt panic, even though IÆm galvanic! █▌
▐█ IÆm the only non-Hispanic on the Mexican Titanic. █▌
▐█ My loops go round and round, just like a carousel, █▌
▐█ coming out my BR-8, like I was William Tell. █▌
▐█ If you havenÆt heard my name, I hope it rings a bell, █▌
▐█ because IÆm the only guy █▌
▐█ who knows what happened at Roswell. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ Yes IÆm an alien, I come from outer space. █▌
▐█ Yes IÆm an alien, IÆm going to rock this place. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Some people say IÆm not funny, I say okay, █▌
▐█ I canÆt sell records here, IÆm huge in the UK. █▌
▐█ British people tell me to keep rocking on, █▌
▐█ you might have heard me down in London █▌
▐█ rocking heads with this song. █▌
▐█ I was sad when I found out about Santa Claus, █▌
▐█ so I made like Tim Allen and broke some local laws. █▌
▐█ I moved way up north and grew a beard, █▌
▐█ now relatives and friends think IÆm kind of weird. █▌
▐█ But did you think I was heretic when I danced in that church █▌
▐█ like an unemployed crustacean chewing on a birch? █▌
▐█ IÆm addicted to shark meat and books by Mark Twain █▌
▐█ and eating Novocain shipped from the Ukraine. █▌
▐█ My nameÆs not Matthew, but thanks for asking! █▌
▐█ I live in California, because IÆm not Alaskan. █▌
▐█ But thatÆs okay, what can I say? █▌
▐█ My real home is actually light years away. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ You want poetry? Go read Robert Frost, █▌
▐█ the simile in hip-hop is essentially lost, █▌
▐█ like a tearful pallbearer carrying a body, █▌
▐█ or a giant pink Care Bare acting snotty. █▌
▐█ Where can it go? I just donÆt know, █▌
▐█ but check out this funky alphabet flow: █▌
▐█ itÆs like A-B-C-D-E-F-G- █▌
▐█ H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O-P, and ICP on LSD █▌
▐█ or ABC or MTV or the new PC █▌
▐█ you got for free from █▌
▐█ Circuit City in Albuquerque. █▌
▐█ I be the VIP MC on this CD, █▌
▐█ the nameÆs MC Lars Horris, as you can see. █▌
▐█ So where do I start, and where do I begin? █▌
▐█ Yo, itÆs tough to be a funky fresh alien. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Atom You're Awesome █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ My girlfriend hates you but I love your stuff. █▌
▐█ I listen to it all the time, I canÆt get enough. █▌
▐█ I dig your first CD (your debut), █▌
▐█ and ôSociety of People Named Elihu.ö █▌
▐█ And ôMaking Loveö is fresh, this much is true, █▌
▐█ but ôRedefining Musicö is funky and new. █▌
▐█ And so I crank it up, turn it up, █▌
▐█ and pump up the bass. █▌
▐█ The packageÆs synth lines are up in my face. █▌
▐█ I listen to it when I drive any place. █▌
▐█ Up yours to anyone who says IÆve got bad taste! █▌
▐█ AtomÆs music rocks, with nerdy soul. █▌
▐█ His new-wave-synth-punk is never dull. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ Atom, youÆre awesome. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ I had a dream █▌
▐█ when I was in grade school █▌
▐█ that Rob Halford, he kissed me, see fool. █▌
▐█ And I was welcomed to the family with Connor, █▌
▐█ it was undercover funny just like a longer █▌
▐█ keyboard that Enya played. █▌
▐█ So I pumped iron and I got paid █▌
▐█ when I owned the Redskins █▌
▐█ with the Ghetto Boys, █▌
▐█ breaking down the walls with kilogram toys. █▌
▐█ And we sang to Madonna, all night long, █▌
▐█ I opened up my heart, I opened it strong █▌
▐█ to Tim Allen, whoÆs not that funny, █▌
▐█ in Philadelphia where I made lots of money █▌
▐█ as a goalie, sixteen-hundred pounds. █▌
▐█ Chillling on the ice rink so profound, █▌
▐█ upside down from here on the map, █▌
▐█ sick of people who give me crap. █▌
▐█ So I put them on an island in the middle of the sea, █▌
▐█ and it was just Atom, Atom and me. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Certified █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ I spot an active drowning victim form a mile away, █▌
▐█ I save old men in seas like Hemmingway. █▌
▐█ The swimming pool not taken? █▌
▐█ Watch out for Frost, █▌
▐█ donÆt get busted like Milton, █▌
▐█ or paradise will be lost. █▌
▐█ ItÆs like that, and thatÆs the way it is. █▌
▐█ DonÆt Run-DMC, walk like the other kids. █▌
▐█ And if you get in trouble, I use a contact dive, █▌
▐█ I extent my rescue tube to keep you alive. █▌
▐█ If youÆre submerged, IÆll dive feet first, █▌
▐█ and bring you to a backboard, never to a hearse. █▌
▐█ Because DOA victims are for amateurs, █▌
▐█ I do it my safe way, you do it yours, █▌
▐█ like RaleyÆs or LuckyÆs or Albertsons. █▌
▐█ Did the victim hurt his neck? IÆm going in. █▌
▐█ I support your chin, airway and spine, █▌
▐█ with my head-splint technique everything is fine. █▌
▐█ My EAP is CPR after those rescue breaths, █▌
▐█ then IÆll check your airway for respiratory arrest. █▌
▐█ Then itÆs sweep, ventilation, and abdominal thrusts, █▌
▐█ I get the pool toy out I can, will, and must. █▌
▐█ Prepared for emergencies IÆve got my life together, █▌
▐█ and understand my job keeps you alive like Eddie Vedder. █▌
▐█ If youÆre a stressed-out mom █▌
▐█ who keeps her children fettered, █▌
▐█ your kids are safe today, see, no lifeguard is better. █▌
▐█ Ten times as reliable mature and fitter █▌
▐█ than your average lifeguard as a water babysitter, █▌
▐█ Betsy Weeks trained me well at Roble Gym, █▌
▐█ and IÆm slamming into swim safety, not a Slim Jim. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ Lifeguarding at the pool, lake, or the sea, █▌
▐█ I keep both eyes on your progeny. █▌
▐█ The Red Cross has got my back like 1-2-3, █▌
▐█ because IÆm C-E-R-T-F-I-E-D. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ And when I act itÆs with informed consent, █▌
▐█ if you wonÆt cooperate, I circumvent █▌
▐█ and call the cops, best recognize █▌
▐█ itÆs not wise to distract me as I scrutinize █▌
▐█ the pool, itÆs called scanning, best take a hint █▌
▐█ and shut your mouth, you donÆt matter like lint. █▌
▐█ Larry Flint might argue that your █▌
▐█ voice means nothing, but I be like Bush █▌
▐█ and say for safety it means nothing. █▌
▐█ IÆm disciplined and talented at what I do, █▌
▐█ and hope to say the same for my lifeguard crew, █▌
▐█ because unlike the Insane Clown Posse, █▌
▐█ we practice our skills repeatedly █▌
▐█ and donÆt cash in on tentative integrity █▌
▐█ or fire dope producers for more money. █▌
▐█ Wait, what, where was I? █▌
▐█ I guess I got side-tracked █▌
▐█ dissing Detroit high school drop-outs █▌
▐█ with new albums that are whack. █▌
▐█ Back on track, hereÆs the point: █▌
▐█ IÆm safe like ôwhat!ö █▌
▐█ Making sure the chemical room doorÆs always shut. █▌
▐█ See that gardenerÆs dirty trowel? █▌
▐█ Well, I donÆt. IÆm too busy making █▌
▐█ sure your kids stay afloat. █▌
▐█ And see that dude who kind of looks like Shrek, █▌
▐█ but imported like badly dubbed French Star Trek? █▌
▐█ Nope, I double check █▌
▐█ the bubble trek from your kidÆs lungs. █▌
▐█ The shovel speck or █▌
▐█ smuggled Shrek distract no one █▌
▐█ like me, I donÆt notice, no, just your kids. █▌
▐█ But did I see that kid run? Oh yes I did! █▌
▐█ Peripherally, so IÆm a lay the smack down █▌
▐█ and turn their smiles into one collective frown. █▌
▐█ ôHey kids, stop running! You know the rule!ö █▌
▐█ Yes IÆm a tool from lifeguard school █▌
▐█ but safety is cool here at the pool, █▌
▐█ and trust me on the sunscreen, donÆt be a fool. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ The SΘance at Harpers Ferry █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Well they hung John Brown in 1859 █▌
▐█ After his revolt did not go fine. █▌
▐█ Trying to free the slaves was a noble cause, █▌
▐█ Like putting one's faith in the Wizard of Oz. █▌
▐█ And I know they've got John Brown in the ground, █▌
▐█ Yet I know his story's not fully text-book bound. █▌
▐█ And I know his body's a molderin' away, █▌
▐█ And I know his rifles have long turned to clay. █▌
▐█ But I figure it's time to bring him some respect, █▌
▐█ After all his spirit must be quite abject █▌
▐█ After being lynched for humanitarian deeds, █▌
▐█ Giving Brown a hand is exactly what he needs. █▌
▐█ So I'm here in West Virginia with my Oujia Board, █▌
▐█ To bring back faith in a soldier long ignored. █▌
▐█ It's possible you'd think my intentions are scary, █▌
▐█ With this sΘance that I'm having at Harpers Ferry. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ 'Cause now I'm channeling John Brown's ghost. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Because John Brown was an abolitionist █▌
▐█ He did his thing at Harpers Ferry, though he missed █▌
▐█ The opportunity to lead a slave revolt █▌
▐█ Because the West Virginian army made him holt. █▌
▐█ He got caught by some racists who weren't down █▌
▐█ With his liberal liberation, much too profound. █▌
▐█ He was saving the souls of a suppressed race, █▌
▐█ Society cut him down, shoved their morals in face. █▌
▐█ They said John Brown, John Brown █▌
▐█ Just surrender now. █▌
▐█ John Brown, John Brown, █▌
▐█ We just don't know how █▌
▐█ You could ever think you'd get away with this. █▌
▐█ His public execution was their ultimate diss. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ So I'm here at Harpers Ferry, waiting for a sign █▌
▐█ To communicate with John Brown, through his mind. █▌
▐█ And I'm focusing on his very brave deeds █▌
▐█ Occasional respect is what the dead need. █▌
▐█ Then all of a sudden, he appears to me █▌
▐█ Like I'm Macbeth, and he's the witches three. █▌
▐█ He looks into my eyes, like they're two jars █▌
▐█ And says, "Hello, you must be Lars." █▌
▐█ And I'm quite surprise to see Brown today, █▌
▐█ Levitating like Slimer, and pale as clay. █▌
▐█ Yet he looks tired, and he looks warn, █▌
▐█ The expression in his eyes is somewhat forlorn. █▌
▐█ I ask him for advice on racial harmony █▌
▐█ He tells me to continue fighting bigotry. █▌
▐█ He says we can look forward to a new society, █▌
▐█ And that he digs the song I did with B. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ My Rhymes Rhyme █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ Roses are red, violets are blue. █▌
▐█ My rhymes rhyme, but yours donÆt. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Hey! IÆm all up in your face like a rabid chimp, █▌
▐█ IÆll eat shrimp on a blimp but I ainÆt no wimp. █▌
▐█ I send American flags to Ho Chi Minh, █▌
▐█ and Bart Simpson toys to Sam Kinison. █▌
▐█ If youÆre akin to sin, you may just win, █▌
▐█ unless you buy a condom thatÆs made of lamb skin. █▌
▐█ IÆm down with you of course and your friend Ian, █▌
▐█ although half of this rap is Indo European. █▌
▐█ I translated it so it would make sense █▌
▐█ to all you ladies and gents but thereÆs no evidence █▌
▐█ if IÆm going too fast or if IÆm going too slow. █▌
▐█ You can always press ôrepeatö on this funky fresh flow. █▌
▐█ Though you may not even know if I mean what I say, █▌
▐█ itÆs legit when I tell you this homey donÆt play. █▌
▐█ So sit back and relax and pop open a Coke, █▌
▐█ compared to me, 50 Cent, your rhymes are a joke. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ Word, word, word to your mother and your father too, █▌
▐█ and props to anyone who keeps staying true. █▌
▐█ And shout outs to my homeys across the globe, accept diversity █▌
▐█ but diss a homophobe. █▌
▐█ The only way to understanding is to embrace the truth, █▌
▐█ weÆre all creatures of God, Buddha, Allah, and Zeus. █▌
▐█ WeÆre only here for a bit, so make the best of it. █▌
▐█ DonÆt look back in sixty years █▌
▐█ to see your life wasà garbage! █▌
▐█ But the point IÆm trying to make is that █▌
▐█ my flows are so def like a big milkshake. █▌
▐█ I donÆt mean to brag, I donÆt mean to boast, █▌
▐█ but the Sugarhill Gang is misquoted the most. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ So get this point right here, itÆs perfect clear, █▌
▐█ props to anyone who bought ôNothing to Fear.ö █▌
▐█ Shout outs to Wesley Willis, Atom G., and John Hall. █▌
▐█ Word to MC Paul Barman, hey return my call! █▌
▐█ WhatÆs up to Jerry Garcia, Hendrix, Morrison and Zappa, █▌
▐█ word to Devo, ôWeird Al,ö and those girls from Abba. █▌
▐█ I hope you have a good day and that youÆre feeling swell, █▌
▐█ even though the music industry can be hell. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Rapbeth (Foul is Fair) █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Sometimes Shakespeare's over done. █▌
▐█ His constant sadness is no fun. █▌
▐█ The comic relief's the best part █▌
▐█ Fans just can't wait for it to start. █▌
▐█ The pain inside Macbeth is clear- █▌
▐█ It seems to bring a heavy tear. █▌
▐█ The story's tragic, most the time... █▌
▐█ Who needs free verse when you've got rhymes? █▌
▐█ What's hip from Macbeth, you say? █▌
▐█ Comic relief, on any day! █▌
▐█ And so we'll take the funny parts █▌
▐█ And understand just where they start. █▌
▐█ We'll take the rhymes that stick out most. █▌
▐█ And loop them twice (so not to boast). █▌
▐█ We've got this sound for MTV, █▌
▐█ We introduce the Witches Three. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Thrice the A-flat chord has rung. █▌
▐█ Thrice, and once the symbol chimed. █▌
▐█ Producer cries, "Tis time, 'tis time." █▌
▐█ Producer cries, "Tis time, 'tis time." █▌
▐█ Round about the record goes; █▌
▐█ Into which our lyrics go. █▌
▐█ Bass line which did like (we not) █▌
▐█ Did not go into our pot. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ Double, double, toil and trouble. █▌
▐█ Fire burn, and cauldron bubble. █▌
▐█ Fair is foul, and foul is fair; █▌
▐█ We must warn you, Macbeth, beware. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ I never wanted to be a witch, █▌
▐█ Casting spells gives me an itch. █▌
▐█ I'm allergic to my cat █▌
▐█ And this black robe makes me look fat. █▌
▐█ Bringing apparitions is █▌
▐█ Not really the type of bis. █▌
▐█ I want to be in for good. █▌
▐█ I would quit, if I could. █▌
▐█ But saying that "I'm out of here," █▌
▐█ Is not something that people hear. █▌
▐█ So we're stuck here for a few more years. █▌
▐█ Never mind Hectate's jeers. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Don't tell me what you want █▌
▐█ (Want you really really want), █▌
▐█ Macbeth, if you want to get ahead. █▌
▐█ Try to stay away form murder █▌
▐█ And be happy with your power █▌
▐█ If you want to get to act six keeping your head. █▌
▐█ We know that power is bad █▌
▐█ When it makes all of your █▌
▐█ Loved ones sad (so sad) █▌
▐█ We guess Malcolm won't be too glad █▌
▐█ When he sees what you did to his dad. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Macbeth: █▌
▐█ If it were done when 'tis done, █▌
▐█ then 'twere well █▌
▐█ If were done quickly. █▌
▐█ And so now I ponder about killing █▌
▐█ this guy and inheriting even more power. █▌
▐█ And so, if I do do these evil deeds, █▌
▐█ I will probably suffer █▌
▐█ horribly, as we all know the █▌
▐█ importance of karma. █▌
▐█ And power corrupts, obviously, █▌
▐█ so I am determined, I guess █▌
▐█ to stay away from slaying Duncan, █▌
▐█ and stick to living a peaceful life. █▌
▐█ But wait... █▌
▐█ Is this a dagger which I see before me, █▌
▐█ The handle toward my hand? █▌
▐█ Come, let me clutch thee, █▌
▐█ and in doing so, I will kill Duncan. █▌
▐█ My strange and self-abuse █▌
▐█ Is the initiate fear that wants hard use. █▌
▐█ We are yet but young in deed, █▌
▐█ We are yet but young in deed. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ The moral of this story is- █▌
▐█ lighten up and try to give █▌
▐█ A new perspective to your life, █▌
▐█ It's not all darkness pain and strife █▌
▐█ Don't caught up in superstition █▌
▐█ or swallowed by old tradition, █▌
▐█ Thesbians would be completer █▌
▐█ shouting "Macbeth" in the theatre. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Make Way for Ducklings █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ HeÆs a No Exit ôGö in the place to be, █▌
▐█ he goes to Stanford University. █▌
▐█ And since Kindergarten he acquired knowledge, █▌
▐█ and after twelve grade he went straight to college. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Well TomÆs a pop culture primate with the IQ of a fetus, █▌
▐█ social IQ twenty-five; you know that I mean this. █▌
▐█ Between his DVDÆs clogged arteries and MP3Æs, █▌
▐█ heÆs got this antisocial mental brain disease. █▌
▐█ And I want to break him out, want to show him the world. █▌
▐█ Want to get him blazed, want to get him a girl. █▌
▐█ Want to take him camping down in Ventana. █▌
▐█ Want to enlighten him, like the Dalai Llama. █▌
▐█ HeÆd otherwise never known the beauty to be seen █▌
▐█ beyond his flat-panel PC LCD screen. █▌
▐█ But would he care if I took him by the hand, █▌
▐█ planned on a trip to Brain-Expansion Land? █▌
▐█ I donÆt mean to be a pushy REI creep, █▌
▐█ but youÆll thank me when youÆre chilling six feet deep █▌
▐█ and the worms crawl in and the worms crawl out █▌
▐█ and the worms play PS2 on your snout. █▌
▐█ No doubt, what IÆm about is helping you, █▌
▐█ to lively up yourself like Marley would do. ,br>And weÆre █▌
▐█ picking up more people as we go, █▌
▐█ introverted sad humans, no internal glow. █▌
▐█ WeÆve got to keep driving, cars out of our way! █▌
▐█ IÆve got nascent cargo here on lifeÆs highway. █▌
▐█ As precious as small birds straight out the shell, █▌
▐█ check the chorus, the metaphor explains itself well. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ Make way for ducklings, █▌
▐█ make way for these introverted ducklings. █▌
▐█ Make way for ducklings; █▌
▐█ soon theyÆll be existentialist heroes. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Okay quiz time now that our trip is done, █▌
▐█ you all grew socially, learned and had fun. Question one, █▌
▐█ ôYouÆre in class with a hottie named Sue, █▌
▐█ and one day she walks in and sits next to you. █▌
▐█ Her shirt says æthe Sopranos,Æ and you dig that show, █▌
▐█ there might be a connection between you two,ö so, █▌
▐█ do you (A) say, ôHey, I like your shirt,ö █▌
▐█ (B) look away, outside at the dirt, █▌
▐█ (C) send her an e-mail, later that day, with a link to a fan █▌
▐█ site you think is okay, or █▌
▐█ (D) make a joke about HBOÆs █▌
▐█ popular, uncensored mafia shows, █▌
▐█ and catch SueÆs attention with your cultured wit, █▌
▐█ working it like Matt Groening works it. █▌
▐█ Well the answer is (D), obviously, █▌
▐█ negative points if you said (B) or (C). █▌
▐█ Next question, ôLetÆs say youÆre a dad with two small kids, █▌
▐█ and youÆre chilling on vacation like your own family did. █▌
▐█ And you go to Boston, because itÆs fun, █▌
▐█ and you go to the park and walk or run. █▌
▐█ And then you see some birds, walking past, █▌
▐█ not too slow or not too fast.ö █▌
▐█ Do you (A) say, ôKids! Check it out, █▌
▐█ these birds are mobile, without a doubt,ö █▌
▐█ or (B) say nothing and be like, ôWhatever, █▌
▐█ IÆve seen cooked birds that look better,ö █▌
▐█ or (C) toss the birds some candy or fish, █▌
▐█ well the answer is (D), and (D) is this: █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ Make way for ducklings, █▌
▐█ make way for those migrating ducklings. █▌
▐█ Make way for ducklings; █▌
▐█ because now youÆre an existentialist hero. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Shout outs to Tomohawk, █▌
▐█ shout outs to the Moonies. █▌
▐█ Truck Records is in effect. █▌
▐█ Shout outs to you, █▌
▐█ thank you for listening to this song. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Humphrey the Whale █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ Humphrey the Whale should have GPS, █▌
▐█ Humphrey the Whale should get GPS. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ (DRUM SOLO) █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ So youÆre not stuck in the █▌
▐█ Sacramento Delta, Humphrey! █▌
▐█ Fresh water is not good for marine mammals. █▌
▐█ So stay out of the Sacramento Delta █▌
▐█ and swim in the San Francisco Bay █▌
▐█ where you belongà █▌
▐█ because itÆs not healthy, █▌
▐█ and this is the end of my song, █▌
▐█ Humphrey. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Sarah █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ I met you in September of 2000, █▌
▐█ my heart skipped a beat with feelings profound and █▌
▐█ I gave you my soul and virginity. █▌
▐█ I loved you so much; you were the world to me. █▌
▐█ Seventeen months together and then we separated, █▌
▐█ due to college and commitments the fantasy faded. █▌
▐█ It was hard as hell, winter quarter for me, █▌
▐█ even though in the long run it made us free. █▌
▐█ And IÆm not mad at you, wait, yes I am, █▌
▐█ I just wish one more time I could hold your hand █▌
▐█ and say, ôSarah, take care, until the end. █▌
▐█ I want you to know IÆll always be your friend.ö █▌
▐█ I canÆt pretend the year never occurred, █▌
▐█ you always said weÆd be in touch, █▌
▐█ you gave me your word. █▌
▐█ But the full moonÆs dark, █▌
▐█ and GarlandÆs gone, █▌
▐█ and IÆm tearing up your pictures █▌
▐█ as IÆm writing this song. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ Sarah, I canÆt seem to find the key, █▌
▐█ we tossed together into the Velvet Sea, █▌
▐█ you said youÆd always be there, █▌
▐█ but it wasnÆt true. █▌
▐█ But IÆm over you, Sarah, IÆm over you. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ And when you left it had a deep effect on my life, █▌
▐█ cutting me sharply like a serrated knife. █▌
▐█ But Sarah IÆve rolled forward and my headÆs in the stars, █▌
▐█ but some mornings when itÆs cold, IÆll wonder how you are. █▌
▐█ It went sour like our showers together turning cold, █▌
▐█ and IÆll reminisce with passion █▌
▐█ when my face is gray and old. █▌
▐█ Or so IÆm told we all do when we turn eighty-two, █▌
▐█ IÆll think of high school, Pebble Beach, and you. █▌
▐█ ItÆs true IÆm doing fine █▌
▐█ though youÆre sometimes on my mind, █▌
▐█ your adolescent body, acceptable to fine. █▌
▐█ But nothing gold can stay and dawn goes down today, █▌
▐█ and Sarah youÆll have cellulite and crowÆs feet some day. █▌
▐█ Okay, hey I still love you, itÆs true, █▌
▐█ and I hope Whitman College is good to you. █▌
▐█ Things are okay now, though they used to seem wrong, █▌
▐█ IÆm over you like Sidney writing LauraÆs last song. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ Escape from Robot Island (featuring MNP) █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ LARS: August 4th, 1990, kicking it across the bay, █▌
▐█ when we went straight to that island █▌
▐█ on that momentous day. █▌
▐█ To explore it, not ignore it, like Christopher C. █▌
▐█ MNP and Lars H., pioneers adrift at sea. █▌
▐█ And so we went ashore, █▌
▐█ knowing not what was in store, █▌
▐█ ætill there came a crazy noise that we could not ignore. █▌
▐█ Fourteen robo-primates, they came straight for us, █▌
▐█ nasty and ugly, like a zit brimming with puss. █▌
▐█ So we hopped into our boat, hoping it would float, █▌
▐█ ætill we found a robo-monkey had chewed it like a goat. █▌
▐█ And a big hole remained at the bottom of our craft, █▌
▐█ as it began to sink, the robo-creatures laughed. █▌
▐█ Then out of the woods came more robots by the dozens, █▌
▐█ daddies, mommies, aunts, and uncles, grandmas, grandpas, and █▌
▐█ cousinsà █▌
▐█ whole robo-families, thirsting for blood. █▌
▐█ Vampiric evil machines caked in oil, grease, and blood. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ CHORUS █▌
▐█ Escape from Robot Island, █▌
▐█ weÆll take them to the desert █▌
▐█ trip their circuits and fry them. █▌
▐█ CanÆt stay in Robot Island, █▌
▐█ these robots are maniacal, █▌
▐█ letÆs beat them up and hide them. █▌
▐█ Get out of Robot Island, █▌
▐█ donÆt want to be your robo-lunch, █▌
▐█ your robo-canned-food-blend. █▌
▐█ Delete Robot Island, you evil R2D2Æs, █▌
▐█ now itÆs time to meet your end. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ MNP: WhatÆs that you say, boy havenÆt you heard? █▌
▐█ Call me a stupid-ass white boy, flip me the bird? █▌
▐█ I want to smack you right now in the face, █▌
▐█ but theyÆre locked on me, stalking this place. █▌
▐█ Today has been a scary day, █▌
▐█ these robots they donÆt want to play, █▌
▐█ their bodies are metallic gray, █▌
▐█ their wires look like plastic hay. █▌
▐█ These robots chased us through the night, █▌
▐█ everybody knows that I put up a fight █▌
▐█ to the different kinds, they blow my mind, █▌
▐█ giant eyeball watching me reading my mind. █▌
▐█ There are fury ones with blades █▌
▐█ coming out of their fur, █▌
▐█ robots riding chariots just like Ben-Hur, █▌
▐█ a ton that will toss you in a chasm, █▌
▐█ balls that drill you like in Phantasm. █▌
▐█ Tall ones, short ones, round ones, long ones, █▌
▐█ little ones, green ones, right ones, wrongs. █▌
▐█ Batteries not included, these things attack, █▌
▐█ Model ZX goes for your sack. █▌
▐█ Big metal teeth ainÆt too friendly. █▌
▐█ Mechanical death? ThatÆs not for me! █▌
▐█ All the different Doomsday Machines, █▌
▐█ we have to stop them with live-or-die means. █▌
▐█ They have their cold metallic hearts, █▌
▐█ soulless just like Kinkade's art, █▌
▐█ we need to learn to play the part, █▌
▐█ getting out alive is where weÆll start. █▌
▐█ Saving ourselves, see that is our mission, █▌
▐█ like IÆm running from the firm in the novel by Grisham. █▌
▐█ Or Tommyknockers, by Mr. King, █▌
▐█ on the run and this ainÆt no dream. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ MNP: Hiding out on the tree house floor, █▌
▐█ evil bots knocking at the door. █▌
▐█ LARS: We climbed up here to get away █▌
▐█ and weÆve been stuck all night and day. █▌
▐█ MNP: We built a gun, quadruple barreled, █▌
▐█ quiver filled with acid arrows. █▌
▐█ LARS: There was a chainsaw that we found, █▌
▐█ like Ash we wielded it around. █▌
▐█ MNP: We used it like a robot shank, █▌
▐█ little did we know the chain would break. █▌
▐█ LARS: We hat a copper melting pot, █▌
▐█ filled with oil very hot. █▌
▐█ MNP: It burned right through the wooden planks, █▌
▐█ they climbed up and they said, ôThanks.ö █▌
▐█ LARS: They want violence, not harmless pranks. █▌
▐█ MNP: Run, Lars, run, just like Tom Hanks. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ ROBOT: Foolish humans, time to die, █▌
▐█ weÆll gobble you up like ham on rye. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ LARS: WeÆve done everything that we can do; █▌
▐█ it was up to me, now itÆs up to you. █▌
▐█ MNP: The arrows, we still have those, █▌
▐█ letÆs fire them and see how it goes. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ ROBOT: Foolish humans, that wonÆt work. █▌
▐█ WeÆll get you both, prepare to hurt. █▌
▐█ Your blood will drip, █▌
▐█ your blood will spurt and █▌
▐█ youÆll be six feet under dirt. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ MNP: So this is what it feels like being the prey? █▌
▐█ The early bot gets the human, or so they say. █▌
▐█ LARS: Wait! ItÆs time to die? I donÆt want to go yet! █▌
▐█ I never went to Russia or owned a private jet. █▌
▐█ I never kissed a lion or went bowling nude, █▌
▐█ IÆve never gone hang gliding or had hamster food. █▌
▐█ MNP: Pull yourself together man, █▌
▐█ youÆre getting me annoyed. █▌
▐█ LetÆs not go out in shame! █▌
▐█ LetÆs go out shooting droids. █▌
▐█ You forgot about my Remington █▌
▐█ taped to my Smith & Wesson, █▌
▐█ my aim is next to perfect, █▌
▐█ letÆs teach these things a lesson. █▌
▐█ Stop! █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ ROBOT: No! █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ LARS: Shoot! █▌
▐█ MNP: Yes, IÆm about to do it. █▌
▐█ LARS: Go! MNP: Ha! █▌
▐█ LARS: Nice, but weÆre not half-way through it. █▌
▐█ ThereÆs eight-hundred more, █▌
▐█ and youÆve only got two bullets. █▌
▐█ MNP: If anyone can make it, █▌
▐█ MNP and Lars can do it. █▌
▐█ LARS: YouÆre right MNP, █▌
▐█ letÆs overcome our fears, █▌
▐█ machines wonÆt run humanity █▌
▐█ like twisted engineers. █▌
▐█ █▌
▐█ REPEAT CHORUS █▌
▐█ █▌
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███▀ ▀ ▄▄██▄▄ BY █ █ ▀ ▄▓███ m0lo- ▐███▓▓▓▌ ▄███▀▀
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▌AWSKEE▐██████▄▀▀ ██████████▄██▌ ■ ▀████▄ ▄▄█████▓▓▀ ████ OF CRO
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▀▀█▄▄▄█▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀ Version: October 1st, 2005 ▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀
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