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░ ██ ██ Artist: Mutilated Messiah ██ ██
▓ █░░ ■█ Album: Total Fucking Slaughter █■ ░░█
■ █▓▀ █ Year: 2010 █ ▀▓█ ░
█ ▓ Rel. Date: 2011-03-13 ▓ █
▒ ▒ Genre: Death Metal ▒ ▒
█▄ ░ Label: MYSTIC INSIGHT ░ ▄█
░ █▄ ░ Source: CD ░ ▄█
░ █▓ Type: Album ▓█ ░
▓ █ Quality: VBR, 44.1kHz, Joint Stereo █ ░ ▓
▓ █ █ ░ ▓
▄ ■ ■ ▓ ■
░█ █░ ▀
█ As a reviewer, I like to give verbal justice to █
█ the effort put forth by the musicians I write █
█ about. Since bands like Brodequin and Cryptopsy, █
█ Death and Suffocation, Lord Azmo and Qafas give █
█ their all in creating their music; I try to ensure █
█ my efforts reciprocate theirs. With Mutilated █
█ Messiah, there is no effort. The band doesnÆt try. █
█ Instead, this band mocks the music I enjoy, find █
█ meaning in, and can actually understand. Therefore █
█ I will choose to mock this band while I ensure █
█ that the effort the band put into their music is █
█ reciprocated in my review. Expect a lot of swears, █
█ incoherence, and unnecessarily inflammatory █
█ comments, because that is all Mutilated Messiah █
█ deserves and all that this band brings to the █
█ table in the pathetically titled ôTotal Fucking █
█ Slaughterö. █
█ With eleven tracks of agonizing sixteenth note █
█ cymbal hits on top of eighth note snare drumming, █
█ inaudible bass guitar, a single riff from a single █
█ guitar for each single track, and terrible yells █
█ that are supposed to be gutturals, this band █
█ deserves to have taken the place of Decapitated in █
█ the bus wreck, Buddy Holly in the plane crash, or █
█ Great White in the inferno caused by their █
█ pyrotechnics mishap. Why do all the adversities █
█ have to happen to good bands while these mindless █
█ people still mill around from club to club █
█ defaming and giving stereotype to bands that can █
█ actually make music? █
█ Mutilated Messiah has the kind of cohesion █
█ expected from a toddler banging wooden spoons on █
█ metal pots and pans. By this I mean these useless █
█ musicians actually have the mental capacity start █
█ a riff and their musically retarded formulaic drum █
█ beat at the exact same time, wow they really █
█ deserve a cookie. WhatÆs more, the vocalist has █
█ the ability to come in at random times, make no █
█ sense, and destroy each flaccid structure the █
█ terrible sounding guitar and annoying glam █
█ drumming create, geez they must really know their █
█ death metal. And around all this terrible sound, █
█ the band is able to encapsulate some insightful █
█ words like ôBlow the Goatö, ôEat Shit and Dieö, █
█ and ôHowling at the Moonö, Yonkers, I wonder who █
█ they ripped off for that last shithouse title. If █
█ you donÆt get it yet, Mutilated Messiah, who I █
█ expect are probably a group of asshole meatheads █
█ who decided to leave their ôEnter Sandmanö █
█ blasting gym for fifteen minutes while they █
█ ôwroteö this crap, I am being condescending █
█ towards your showcased stupidity, and you deserve █
█ every word of it for this pathetic excuse for █
█ music, let alone this impotent hard rock that you █
█ call death metal. █
█ This is what happens when requesting a review █
█ blows up in your face. If youÆre part of a label, █
█ try to find good bands. Try to find bands that █
█ actually play the style they say they play, and █
█ try to ensure the music fans who buy from you █
█ arenÆt getting ripped off. But enough about the █
█ label, letÆs talk more about this atrocity of a █
█ band. █
█ The reason for this score of four percent is █
█ simple: 0% for the terrible guitar, especially the █
█ horrific solo on ôSkull Throneö, 0% for the █
█ terrible drumming, 0% for the terrible vocals, 0% █
█ for the inaudible bass guitar, 0% for the terrible █
█ song titles, 0% for the terrible songwriting, 0% █
█ for the terrible production, 0% for their █
█ designation as (and their contribution to) death █
█ metal, 0% for their actual hard rock, and one █
█ percent for every following word: fuck you █
█ Mutilated Messiah. If you ever see this band live, █
█ please try, convict, and execute them for treason █
█ to metal. █
▓ ▓
▒ ▒
░ 1. Blow the Goat 2:48 ░
░ 2. Total Fucking Slaughter 4:23 ░
░ 3. Maim to Please 2:28 ░
░ 4. Monoliths of Death 1:52 ░
░ 5. Motorcunt 2:37 ░
░ 6. Skull Throne 8:51 ░
░ 7. Eat Shit and Die 3:34 ░
░ 8. Raising the Sign of Evil 3:11 ░
░ 9. The Path to Redemption 3:09 ░
░ 10. Howling at the Moon 5:50 ░
░ 11. The Demons Prayer 4:47 ░
░ 43:30 ░
░ ▒ ▒
▓ █ ░ ▓ ░
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